• Melissa Campbell

Why a “Self-Date” is so Important for Self-Care




When was the last time you put aside a whole afternoon or evening to spend solely with yourself?


It’s likely to be something you overlook, especially when life gets busy and life get's busy a lot right?


It may feel indulgent to spend time by yourself and with yourself but a “self-date” is the missing ingredient in most people’s self-care routine and I am here to champion it.


I have just recently had one. A whole night in a hotel by myself. I took myself out to lunch and to the cinema. I ate in bed, I read a magazine I'd been wanting to read and had a leisurely breakfast in the morning. It was bliss but more than than, it was needed!


A self-care self-date is about doing something you like to do without the guilt. It is something that helps to feed your soul.

When you think about taking a chunk of time just for you, what comes up? Guilt, resistance, worry who would look after everyone. If you had any of these thoughts or even if you didn't...a self-care date is for you.


On your self- date, you are not tending to, trying to fix or look after anyone else but you! You don't have to answer to or rely on anyone else and you can 100% please yourself.


There might be something you love to do or something you want to see but no-one wants to come with you. Go do it yourself...you'll probably have more fun.


There is literally one step to get started and it's this....:


Set time aside: Just like you’d plan a mutually convenient time for a date with another person, the first step for a “self-date” is to book some time in your schedule to focus on yourself. It is absolutely crucial that you treat this time as a non-negotiable appointment that you can’t back out of and that you honour it.



What to do on a “self-date”? The options are endless. Just make sure that it’s an activity that you enjoy and that will benefit your wellbeing. And if you really can't get out to have one, make it in your home. Tell others that you are not to be disturbed and honour it by turning off your phone.


Need some inspiration? Here are a few ideas:


  • Indulge in a bubble bath. Try some relaxing essential oils for a super chilled soak adding in some Epsom salts. Ah bliss!

  • A spa day or if the budget doesn’t stretch to it, try a DIY spa at home with a face mask, manicure, pedicure and self-massage.

  • Going to a concert or to the theatre.

  • Walking in nature and paying close attention to the sights and sounds you encounter.

  • Spend some time in a park. London, for example, has some amazing parks with different cornered areas. You could literally spend a day there.

  • Go to the cinema and see a film

  • A yoga class

  • A workshop of some sort

  • Dine out somewhere eating your favourite foods

  • Getting creative and making some positive affirmation cards.

  • Journal writing.

  • Bake a cake and sit down to lovingly eat it

  • A Self Care Sunday to get you ready for the week ahead. Include things like meditation, yoga, a relaxing bath and other activities that soothe the mind and body.

  • Check out my other blog post:50 Ways Simples Ways to Start A Daily Self-Care Practice.

All that is left is for you to grab your diary and mark a date out. It can be for as little or as long as you like.

Enjoyed this post? Want to learn some more self-care tips?


I'm sure you will love my free Facebook group called Everyday Wellness for Women which promotes manageable and sustainable tips for healthier living.



In this group, you will find support and access to mini weekly challenges, free recipes, stress-busting techniques, along with ways to improve your sleep, energy, moods and much more.

Click right here to join my free group today.